31 May, 2017

10 Lessons Learned in My First Year of Full Time Consulting

By Nicole Clark, LMSW|2021-08-19T19:34:35-04:00May 31st, 2017|Categories: Consulting|Tags: consulting, Reflections|4 Comments

One year ago today, I resigned from my day job. Working full time while building a business had taken its toll. I had been there 3 months shy of 6 years. I had given my employer a 60-day notice in order to assist with finding my replacement.

I don’t remember much of what happened that day, but I do remember when 5pm rolled around. I punched out for the last time, hugged a few co-workers, and walked out the door. As I walked out of the building, my eyes welled up with tears. It had less to do with “WTH am I thinking?” and more to do with the fact that honored my passion. On New Years Day 2016, I stood on the observation deck of One World Trade Center, overlooking the city skyline. I told myself that 2016 was the year, and May 31st would be the day I’d leave my job to go into my consulting business full time.

Yes, it was cheesy, and when I left the observatory deck, I felt at peace. I had given myself a deadline several times before, and each time I wasn’t ready. This time, I was. I didn’t know how it was going to happen. I just knew it was going to. I had submitted proposals to several organizations for consulting gigs, and was either turned down or didn’t receive a response. Not too long after making my intention, two of those organizations who turned me down had changed their minds and offered me contracts. A few other organizations reached out to me, including an executive director of a local organization, who specifically wanted to work with me because we went to the same grad school.

Everything fell into place, and the past year has been an eye-opener. Here are 10 lessons I’ve learned in my first year of full time consulting:

It’s uncomfortable (but always remember your WHY)

If I had to choose one word to describe my first year in full-time consulting, it would be “discomfort”. When I was building my business on the side while working full time, I had a rhythm. I had only so much time to do client work, create content for my blog and newsletter, and market myself.

However, like building physical strength means pushing yourself by picking up heavier weights, discomfort has allowed me to grow in many areas of my business. After a while, you begin to see progress. Tasks that would take me hours to complete are easier to do, and things I didn’t think I needed when starting my business, I now have a system for.

Even though I knew I could return to the 9-5 world, I held on to my WHY. There’s a quote from Frederick Nietzsche that says,

“He who has a why can endure any how.”

Running my own business is bigger than creating my own schedule and doing what I want. My WHY was built on the foundation that there aren’t many people doing what I’m doing. My WHY was to ensure that nonprofits, community groups, and agencies are doing right by the women and girls of color they serve. Fine tuning my services down to design thinking, evaluation, strategic planning, and speaking has allowed me to develop a niche within the Reproductive Justice community that I’m becoming know for. On top of that, another WHY has been to show other social workers that there’s more than one way to be a social worker. This applies to any profession. You don’t have to build a career and identity around what your profession expects. You can create a career on your terms, and when you know your WHY, it’s easier to persevere.

It’s a HUGE mindset shift

I’ve felt like giving up at least once a week. I’m a one-woman show, and when you’re used to having someone dictate how your day goes, you begin to miss it. Also, I suddenly had more time than ever, and it became overwhelming.

Outside of making money, strengthening my systems, and getting clearer on who I want to work with, I’ve learned that transitioning from employee to entrepreneur is just as much of a mental game as it is a physical one. You think you’ll be anxious to turn in that resignation letter, but that’s the easy part. One of the biggest benefits that an employer provides is structure. You know when to get up, how long you have to get ready for work, how long your commute will take, what meetings and deadlines you’ll have throughout the day, when your staff supervision is, and how long you have for a lunch break. When working for yourself, you have to build a structure that keeps you motivated and on purpose.

I started out creating a structure that mimicked a 9-5. I created a 9am-5pm work schedule, and one day I realized that it’s ok to not work from 9 to 5. While I do have office hours, I like working in the hours where I feel most creative (and if I have any client meetings, lead calls, or site visits to make).

Your people will always look out for you

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24 May, 2017

Asset Mapping as a Community Organizing Tool

By Nicole Clark, LMSW|2021-08-19T19:34:14-04:00May 24th, 2017|Categories: Research & Evaluation|Tags: program evaluation, Research|0 Comments

Let’s say you are part of an advocacy group that promotes the health benefits of vegetarianism.

You attend a community town hall where residents speak their concerns over what’s occurring in the community and request resources that can benefit the community.

You stand up to the microphone, introduce yourself and your advocacy group, and make a suggestion to host a gathering for residents on vegetarianism. You share all the good statistics: Eating a plant-based diet high in fiber, folic acid, and a whole bunch of vitamins can reduce high cholesterol, lead to better weight management, lower blood pressure, and reduce the risk of heart disease. You make a suggestion of having your group facilitate a number of workshops in the community.

A resident raises her hand and stands up. Eating lots of fruits and vegetables sounds good and all, she says, but she and other residents have tried unsuccessfully to bring a farmers market to the community. There’s community support for a farmers market as it will aid in increasing food security in the community, but there are concerns that getting food at a farmers market will be more expensive compared to the community grocery store. Also, the community cannot decide which area would be best to have the farmers market. The community grocery store is located near the community’s most used subway station. And speaking of the grocery store–it’s not a very pleasant shopping experience. Not only does the meat smell rancid, the fruits and vegetables look questionable. Many of the items are past the expiration date, and the store’s electronic benefits transfer (EBT) system doesn’t work most of the time. Having a farmers market in the neighborhood will not only give the community another option to buy food, but they can also use their EBT cards to buy items at the farmers market.

Another resident stands up. He’s interested in creating a community garden because he likes the idea of growing his own food so he doesn’t have to deal with the community grocery store. There are plenty of vacant lots in the community, and he knows of a large lot of land near the community’s recreation center. There’s a”For Sale” sign but he doesn’t know the first thing in purchasing land and wants to know if other member are interested in buying the lot with him. In fact, he has no idea how to grow fruits and vegetables.

One of the most social-worky phrase you will ever hear is “meet the client where they’re at”. When you’re working with an individual (or a community, for this example), you may have your own agenda. Despite best intentions, if you can’t understand what matters to the community, their concerns and their successes, you will never find a way “in”. In order to build a connection between yourself and the community, you have to establish trust. Your advocacy group’s ultimate goal is helping communities eat healthier, and this community is interested doing that, but maybe not in the way you envision. So, what’s one way to marry your goal to the goals of this community?

Conduct a community asset map.

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17 May, 2017

Change The Narrative: Focusing on the Strengths of Young Women of Color

By Nicole Clark, LMSW|2021-08-19T19:33:52-04:00May 17th, 2017|Categories: Equity & Justice|Tags: Equity, Youth|0 Comments

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Over a year ago, I was invited to join a New York City-based initiative to provide recommendations on improving the health and lived experiences of New York City young women of color. In one of our first meetings, we were asked to identify the struggles that young women of color face in the city. With flip chart papers labeled as “reproductive health”, “education”, “access to physical exercise”, and others, we divided into groups and developed lists of things we felt were impacting young women of color negatively.

When we were done, each flip chart was filled to capacity. It seemed good because we were able to identify so much that we can pull from related to providing recommendations to the city. But as I looked around the room at the other flip charts, I felt incredibly drained. “What are the solutions to all of this?” I asked myself.

I’m glad I wasn’t alone in my concerns, because another person in the room made a crucial observation: First, we were a room full of adults, and while we may work with (or do research on) young women of color and have a pulse on what the issues may be, we’re nowhere near being youth. Second:

There's danger in focusing solely on what's wrong with young women of color. This leads to fear-based solutions. Share on X

It’s draining to focus on what’s wrong, especially when those problems are highlighted within your communities or within the communities you serve or ally with.

This isn’t to say that we should turn a blind eye to the challenges facing our communities. But what if there’s a better way?

What if we identified not only the problems, but the ways in which young women of color show resiliency? What if we asked young women of color to show us what the solutions are?

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12 May, 2017

Self Care Corner: Be Kind To Yourself

By Nicole Clark, LMSW|2021-08-19T19:33:16-04:00May 12th, 2017|Categories: Self & Community Care|Tags: self care, Self Care Corner|0 Comments

This Sunday is Mother’s Day, and depending on who you are, it can be a difficult day to navigate.

One of the last memories I have of my mother prior to her cancer diagnosis was during an argument she had with my dad. I tried to mediate the situation, but was so overcome with emotion I started to cry. She came over to me and gave me a hug, told me how strong I was and that everything would be ok.

As I stood in the middle of my apartment on earlier this week, and thought to myself, “I could really use one of Mama’s hugs right now”. The tears came pouring out. Not so much due to the 16th anniversary of her death being last week, or that the first holiday I experienced after her death was Mother’s Day (although that also sucked), but because I realized in that moment how self critical I am of myself.

Earlier this week, I read an article on 5 strategies for self-compassion, and Dr. Kristin Neff shared:

“Self-compassion acts like a nurturing parent. So even when you don’t do well, you’re still supportive and accepting of yourself. Like a kind parent, your support and love are unconditional, and you realize that it’s perfectly OK to be imperfect.”

Isn’t it interesting how easy it is to show compassion for others, but not so much for ourselves?

When a sister or a close friend is going through something and they confide in us, we do whatever we can to make them feel better though affirmations, spending time together, or helping them seek solutions to their worries. Yet we feel that we have to hold it together. That we’re strong and shouldn’t let others see us sweat. And when we begin to sweat, the negative self talk and judgment creeps in. We wouldn’t dare say the negative things we say to ourselves to someone else. Yet it feels like second nature to participate in negative self-talk all the time.

When we show kindness to ourselves, we become intentional in being aware of how we’re hurting. It may be difficult to do in the moment, but when we catch ourselves before the negative self-talk begins, instead ask:

How can I show compassion to myself right now? How can I be kind to myself in this moment?

We do this by practicing non-judgment as much as possible and we remind ourselves that, in spite of how things look, we’re not as alone as we think. You can also reach out to a friend or loved one, focus on giving yourself encouraging words. Anything else positive someone can say to you will be icing on the cake.

And speaking of not being alone, there are many instances where I’ve felt my mother’s connection. In the last 1-2 years of my mother’s life, she would awaken at 4:20am to get ready for work. As a teen, I would wake up at 4:19am to watch the clock. When it was 4:20am, I would heat my parents’ bedroom door open like clockwork. In fact, I still wake up at 4:20am on most mornings, regardless if I was in a deep sleep just to look at the clock for a while before writing back to sleep.

Another thing that brings me peace is this quite from Law of Attraction guru and motivational speaker Gabrielle Bernstein:

“Though the physical form is gone, the spiritual connection never leaves. This is just the beginning of a different kind of relationship, a relationship that may be more profound than it was in the physical form. Always trust that loved ones who have departed are always supporting you, no matter what.”

The next time the negative self-talk creep up (especially on a day that may be triggering), use it as a reminder to be kind to yourself.

RAISE YOUR VOICE: How do you show kindness to yourself? Share below in the comments section.

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10 May, 2017

Try This: The Journey Map

By Nicole Clark, LMSW|2017-05-10T11:28:02-04:00May 10th, 2017|Categories: Miscellaneous|Tags: Design Thinking, Human Centered Design, Try This|0 Comments

Last month, I introduced design thinking, a process many nonprofits and community groups are using to generate engagement with communities. Empathy is the first step in the process, and the user persona is an outcome we can use to develop programs and services for the ideal communities we want to reach.

Today, let’s focus on the second step in the design thinking process: Define.

After creating a user persona based on the empathy interviews and observation we’ve conducted, we begin to define the problem we want to solve, based on the insights of the intended user. Let’s do this by creating a Journey Map.

The goal of a Journey Map is to give a holistic view of what a stakeholder is going through from their point of view. In the case of creating a program or service, having a variety of stakeholders (a potential program participant, a program facilitator, and the program manager, for example) can yield insights into how a program may work from various perspectives.

Here’s what you need:

A stack of large Post-It notes in one color
Two smaller stacks of Post-It notes in two different colors
Some Sharpie markers
White butcher paper (or a clean white board wide enough for multiple Post-Its)

The steps:

Let’s go back to the user persona we created:

This example is “Nicole”, a nonprofit worker that works at a nonprofit that provides services for formally incarcerated women. She wants to create an awareness campaign that teaches formally incarcerated women about the Reproductive Justice framework and teaches advocacy skills to help formally incarcerated women advocate for accessible reproductive healthcare, both during incarceration and during the transition process. Nicole has now been given the OK to create the program from the executive director. Now, she can work on introducing the RJ framework to staff to generate buy-in for the program and campaign.

Each person get a stack of large Post-Its and 2 stacks of smaller Post-Its (each in different colors) and a Sharpie. The larger Post-Its will be the steps, and the smaller Post-Its will be the “pain points”.

Next, have each participant map out the process of creating this program from their perspective. For this example, let’s have Nicole create her journey map by mapping out her ideal steps needed to create a Reproductive Justice 101 presentation for staff and steps needed to recruit staff to help develop the program and campaign.

Using the large Post-It notes, Nicole creates the following steps and places them on the butcher paper:

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10 Lessons Learned in My First Year of Full Time Consulting

It’s uncomfortable (but always remember your WHY)

“He who has a why can endure any how.”

It’s a HUGE mindset shift

Your people will always look out for you

Asset Mapping as a Community Organizing Tool

Change The Narrative: Focusing on the Strengths of Young Women of Color

There's danger in focusing solely on what's wrong with young women of color. This leads to fear-based solutions. Share on X

Self Care Corner: Be Kind To Yourself

“Self-compassion acts like a nurturing parent. So even when you don’t do well, you’re still supportive and accepting of yourself. Like a kind parent, your support and love are unconditional, and you realize that it’s perfectly OK to be imperfect.”

How can I show compassion to myself right now? How can I be kind to myself in this moment?

RAISE YOUR VOICE: How do you show kindness to yourself? Share below in the comments section.

Like this post? Subscribe to the Raise Your Voice newsletter to receive resources, advice, and tips to help you raise your voice for women and girls of color.

Try This: The Journey Map

Here’s what you need:

The steps:

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